Let’s face it. We’re all inundated these days—with political propaganda, fast food coupons, and suspicious texts warning that your bank account’s been compromised. So when a washed-up orthodontist-turned-sportswriter announces his eighth book, your first instinct might be to mutter “bless his heart,” roll your eyes, and scroll on by.
But before you do, allow me—with all the humility I can muster—to present:
The Top Five Reasons NOT to Buy My New Book, Whining for Posterity: Life, Sports, and Other Things Worth Complaining About
Reason #5: You’ve Already Heard It All Before
Fair. At least the five people outside my immediate family who’ve read all my blogs, chuckled at my columns, and survived a few of my Facebook rants might think so. You know who you are.
You’re thinking, “I don’t need a bound compilation of recycled material cluttering up my coffee table.”
Touché. But this is the director’s cut. Whining for Posterity includes never-before-seen edits, timely updates, and slightly embarrassing bonus reflections by yours truly—organized into tidy little categories like “Life,” “Love,” “Politics,” “Religion,” “Travel,” and “Sports.”
Skip the spiritual stuff. Go straight to the football whining if that’s your thing. I won’t be offended.
Reason #4: You Don’t Like Complaining
Neither do I. That’s why I wrote a whole book about it.
Let me clarify: this isn’t just me griping about the Bengals’ play-calling or America’s healthcare system. It’s an honest, often humorous, occasionally heartfelt look at the little frustrations of life—and the big lessons hiding behind them.
Think of it as therapy, but with fewer co-pays and more Rick Pitino references.
Reason #3: You’re Holding Out for the Movie
Ah yes, the inevitable blockbuster. Picture it: Jackie Chan as me, Meryl Streep as my long-suffering editor, and John Calipari making a surprise cameo as himself.
Sadly, Hollywood hasn’t called. Yet.
So for now, your only option is to read the book. Don’t worry—it’s got plot twists, emotional payoffs, and enough laugh-out-loud moments to keep even the most distracted reader engaged. There’s something in it for everyone.
Best of all? It’s cheaper than a bucket of overpriced movie popcorn.
Reason #2: You Think I’m Just Trying to Make a Buck
Please. I’m a writer. If I wanted to make money, I’d still be straightening teeth.
Truth is, I’m donating all the proceeds from this book to charity. Not because I’m a saint—but because YOU are. Plus, I’d rather give the money away than explain to the IRS why I spent it all on road trips with the Wildcats.
So when you buy Whining for Posterity, you’re not just supporting me. You’re supporting a good cause—and giving yourself (or someone you’re regifting it to) a few laughs, a few tears, and maybe even a fresh perspective on this maddening miracle we call life.
Reason #1: You’d Rather Read John Grisham
Who wouldn’t? I’m no John Grisham.
But here’s the truth: Whining for Posterity isn’t a legal thriller. Nor is it just a collection of gripes and giggles. It’s a scrapbook of moments—some hilarious, some heartfelt—that remind us what really matters. Relationships. Family. Faith. Our dogs. The everyday absurdities that make life worth living.
At some point, we all start thinking about what we’re leaving behind. Not money or monuments, but memories, stories, and maybe a few lessons others can carry forward.
This book is my way of doing that. A little piece of my voice—whiny as it is—preserved for whoever wants to listen.
So no, you don’t have to read it. But if you do, I hope it makes you think a little more about your own legacy—the one you’re writing every day, whether you realize it or not.
Because whining, at its core, is just love in disguise. A love that refuses to let life pass by unnoticed.
So there you have it. Five completely legitimate, totally reasonable, utterly unconvincing reasons not to buy my book.
But if, despite all that, you feel compelled to grab a copy of Whining for Posterity, I won’t stop you. In fact, I’m thanking you now in advance. Flag me down and I’ll sign it for you—maybe even buy you lunch, or at the very least, offer a heartfelt “bless your heart.”
Whining for Posterity—available now on Amazon and wherever books silently judge you from your nightstand. Click here to purchase. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FDLCGR1P
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